TV Trash - Volume 1

What happened to the Real Housewives of Orange County?  They used to be my favorite cast (probably because that’s all I knew) until I saw New York, New Jersey and Beverly Hills.  Even I was shaking my head while watching last Sunday’s episode because I just don’t find a single one of the ladies relatable. 

As this season started, I was thinking that Gretchen was the only tolerable girl left on the show, but that quickly changed during the episode that she just wouldn’t leave Slade alone.  Did she really ask him why he ordered what he ordered for dinner because he was watching his weight?  She probably would have cut off his head and used it as a handbag if he had asked her that question.  So now that Gretchen has gone to the dark side, I think the only ‘real’ person left is Don, but unfortunately I think he’s a little too real for Vicki so we probably won’t be seeing a whole lot more of him in the future.

How about Alexis - is anyone fooled?  I have no issues with people having a strong faith, but if she says “where is that in the Bible?” one more time...(I have no threat to insert here).  The best part about her asking this question for me is that she said it in the same segment in which she discussed her previous marriage AND divorce.  And WTF is with her designing a line of dresses, but only if it doesn’t interfere with her husband and children?  How does her having eighteen nannies (slight exaggeration) not interfere with the time she spends with her kids?  Argh!

I hope you all know that just because I think these women are trashy and superficial does not mean in the least bit that I will stop watching the show.  I also want to make it known that this was a tough post for me to write because I feel a little bit bad judging these people, but then again they agreed to be on this show and as far as I know they aren’t given a script to read…idiots I tell ya.

Entrée Envy

I’m a little worried how the scale is going to be tonight at Weight Watchers.  I ate out six times (not including a couple lunches at Subway) in the last week for two birthday parties, three working lunches and a monthly girl’s dinner…oh and I had two nights of cocktails.  I absolutely make much better decisions when eating out now that I’m on Weight Watchers, but I’m just not a salad kind of girl because I don’t particularly enjoy spending money on food that I know I’m going to be hungry again 20 minutes after eating. 

Anyone that knows me, knows that I’m cheap when it comes to spending money except for eating out (because I clearly love food) and my one to two trips a month to the casino.  I know, I know, it doesn’t make any sense that I’m willing to spend $60 at the casino (I say spend, because going to the casino rarely results in a win), but I’m not willing to pay the extra $2 on my brand of beer if another brand is on sale…and I’m really picky when it comes to beer flavor.   Anyway, my point of bringing up the fact that I’m so cheap except for when it comes to food is that I just don’t enjoy going out to eat like I used to.  The days of going out to eat on a whim and making my food selection based on whatever I’m craving at moment are over.  Now I have to know where we are going ahead of time so that I can preview the menu in an attempt to compare nutrition information.  Some restaurants have gotten on board with publishing the nutrition info, but other places know that publishing this info will simply turn away business.  The absolute hardest part of eating out is that most of the people I’m eating with don’t have to care about their intake. So while I’m eating a grilled chicken sandwich (hold the bun, bacon, cheese, mayo or anything else that makes it good) with undercooked vegetables that are not in season…all I’m thinking about is how I wish I could be eating whatever everyone else at the table has ordered.  Eating out for me is now one big case of Entrée Envy (except on Monday nights after weigh-in which I consider “splurge day”).

Although I may gain tonight for the first time in over six months, I’m still very proud of how far I’ve come and will continue to go….AND I WILL still splurge (another birthday dinner tonight and we are going to my fav…Granite City)

…come back tomorrow and check my comments to see how I did  J 

It Just Got Weird

I’ve decided that I need a writer for my blog.  Well, not a writer but someone to feed me ideas. 

Side-bar: does anyone else find it weird that all of the famous comedians actually have people that write their jokes for them?  Chelsea Handler, for example, has an entire staff of writers.  How does that work?  Do you have to be funny to get famous and then once you’re famous, you don’t have to come up with your own stuff anymore?

Thankfully I have just the right friend that is full of smutty ideas.  This is the same friend that I met for the first time on a thirty six hour train ride to Portland with some mutual friends and the first thing she said to me was “tell me a story.”  I was like who is this girl? Fast forward nine years, we now work together and she is one of my best friends.  To give you a better idea of who she is and how she thinks, think Jack Handy.  Not sure who Jack Handy is?  Here is one of his quotes:

“Why do people in ship mutinies always ask for "better treatment"? I'd ask for a pinball machine, because with all that rocking back and forth you'd probably be able to get a lot of free games.”

Anyway, I was talking to my friend about my blog and in mid-sentence she says:

“Oh my God…I just thought of perfect weekly topic for you.  You should call it ‘It Just Got Weird.”

She proceeds to tell me that she has the perfect shitting It Just Got Weird story.  I’m not sure what she had for lunch, but while she was talking to another co-worker she suddenly realizes she needs to go to the bathroom.  Co-worker says ‘oh, I’ll walk with you.’

Side-bar: shitting in public or while other people are in the restroom will become a blog topic in the future.

My friend panics and thinks to herself ‘ok, I’ll walk to the private restroom and when we get there co-worker will just keep walking to the multi-stall bathroom.’

Friend goes into the private restroom and co-worker keeps walking (or so she thinks).  Friend proceeds to take a good 10 minutes in the bathroom and is surprised to see co-worker standing outside of the restroom now with three other people behind her in line.

Can we say....

It Just Got Weird?

Why do people park in driveways and drive in parkways?

Target or Walmart?

So many people that I know claim they will not step one foot into a Walmart.  If you live where I live, there is good reason.  Before my town arrived in the times and built a Supercenter, I am confident that our Walmart was quite possibly the most disgusting and irritating Walmart that existed.  It was dirty, messy, and I think it made a regular appearance on the "People of Walmart" website and email chains.  The clientele was interesting to say the least.  However, the frugal person that I am, I was able to get passed these short-comings because Walmart simply has the lowest prices in town.

Shopping a Walmart Supercenter was a luxury that I was able to experience often since our parents either lived or had a cabin in town that had a Supercenter.  I would actually prefer a Supercenter over Target because of the large selection and one-stop shopping experience.  Disclaimer - there are no Super Targets near me, so saying that I prefer a Supercenter over Target isn't a fair statement).

I couldn't wait for our Supercenter to open.  I had to drive by the building site everyday on my way to work for what seemed like an eternity until the store finally opened last fall.  What a huge disappointment.  This store is literally a mile from my work and now it's a rare occasion that I choose Walmart over Target.  It's been over six months and they just haven't figured out how to run a Supercenter compared to a standard store.  I can say without hesitation that at least 6 out of 10 of the items on my shopping list are either out of stock or the brand/flavor isn't available.  I've pretty much given up on them at this point.

Since I've given up on Walmart, I'm actually starting to notice that many of the items that I typically buy at Target/Walmart are actually less expensive at Target and a lot of the grocery items are actually lower than the local (cheap) grocery store.  Amazing right?  I pay less for a much better shopping experience.

I was pleased to read an article on Yahoo! today from CNNMoney.com that Target has come out on top for the first time in four years for lowest prices when considering common grocery goods and general merchandise products.

Which do you prefer?


PS - will America PLEASE send either Scotty or Haley home?!

Sister Wives – Awesome! (kind of)

If you haven’t had the opportunity to see the nutty Kody Brown, his three wives….excuse me four wives and 16 children in action, I suggest that you set aside an hour on Sunday to tune in on TLC.  Being a reality tv show junkie, I find the show enjoyable because it’s both entertaining and interesting to learn about their lifestyle that most of us have only heard rumors of.

I think Sister Wives is a great concept (or religious belief in the Brown family’s case), however I’m thinking more along the lines of Sister Friends so we can all have our own spouse.  After Ben and I both had a fantastic weekend with our friends, we had conversation about how awesomely fun it would be to have a house on a block that all of our friends also lived on.  The Brown family has it great (with the exception of sharing of husband). 

1 - They have like a million live-in babysitters at all times; 

2 - if they don’t feel like cooking there is always three other families to mooch off;

3 - I can guarantee there is ALWAYS something to do in their household, so there is never a dull moment;

4 - their best friends are always an earshot away;

5 - and they have enough bodies for an entire football team; 

 

How cool is that?

 I’m sure there are however some downsides.

1 - See # 3 – that could get old.

2 - See #4 – they may eventually be your worst enemy.

3 - See #5 – they don’t have enough for substitutions on each side.

What do you think?

In other news, Chris Brown had another temper tantrum on Good Morning America this morning…weird.

Already?

Is it possible that I have what Andrea called "Bloggers Block" already?  It's only day two and I'm already struggling with what to write about.  Actually, I think it's more that I'm not so sure that people want to read what I layed awake last night thinking about writing about or I don't have quite enough to say about these subjects to justify an entire blog post.  This is the baring with me part that I mentioned yesterday.  So just to help me keep going, Andrea suggested that I fill out the following, which she saw on another blog that she follows.

1. If you have pets, do you see them as merely animals or are they members of your family?
Please...anyone that is reading this blog knows that my cats River and Percy (previously River and Sully before Sully unexpectedly died  a few months back at the age of 6) ARE my children.  If I'm home, River is glued to my lap and so is Percy until his ADD kicks in.  I'd get more cats if I knew I wouldn't be considered the creepy cat lady.

2. If you could have a dream come true, what would it be?My realistic dream is to have a baby.  My fake dream is to win the lottery, but the hundreds of millions lottery that everyone thinks they deserve a piece of, but just the couple million lottery to give me enough to not work the job that I'm not a huge fan of.

3. What would you do with a billion dollars?What wouldn't I do with a billion dollars?

4. What helps to pull you out of a bad mood?I'm super stubborn, but if you can get me to crack a smile when I'm mad then I'll be better.

5. What is your bedtime routine?I try to be in bed early enough to catch Chelsea Lately, but that doesn't seem to be happening lately.  That must be the reason that I'm always tired.

6. What activities did you do in high school? If you could go back, would you do the same stuff or something different?
I played lots of sports and we had lots of sleepovers.  My favorite memories were playing car-hide-and-go-seek in our little town or late nights with a bag of doritos and either Tetris or Dr. Mario.

7. What kind of books do you read?I like criminal mystery type books like "The Girl Who..." books by Stieg Larson or any Chic Lit like Jennifer Weiner.

8. How do you see yourself in 10 years?I wish I knew

9. What’s your fear?I'm a scaredy cat.  I'm afraid of a lot of stuff.  I think I've watched too many real life crime shows....weird, more reality type tv.

10. Would you give up all junk food for the rest of your life for the opportunity to see outer space?Nope.  See #9, heights is one of them.

11. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?Pet my cats that are taking up my half of the bed.

12. If you could change one thing about your significant other, what would it be?I want him to want a king size bed as bad as I do.  See #11.  Other than that, he's perfect just the way he is.

13. If you could pick a new name for yourself, what would it be?I like my name, but if I could change it I might just add "like Donna with an L" to the end of it.  Nobody ever gets it right.

14. If you had to choose between six months of sun or six months of rain, what would you choose?That's a tough one.  I love the rain, but not so sure about six months of it.

15. If you could only eat one thing for the next 6 months, what would it be?Bagels

16. What is the thing you enjoy about blogging the most?Too soon to tell

17. Do you prefer salty or sweet foods?Both...especially together

18. What items are in your purse right now?Oh my gosh...it's a mess.  I probably have four weeks worth of Weight Watchers weeklys in there

19. Name three things on your bucket list.Am I lame if I can't think of anything? To look at this another way...I wish I could snowboard well. I wish I could box, and I wish I had a voice like Carrie Underwood.

20. What do you watch on television that you know you shouldn’t?
Oh boy....
Sunday - Sister Wives, any Kardashian show, Real Housewives
Monday - Bachelor, Dancing with the Stars, Bethenny Ever After
Tuesday - Teen Mom (occasionally)
Wednesday - Real World

I'm sure there are some I'm missing and these are only the shows that I shouldn't be watching.

That's all for today.  I hope to have a topic pop into my mind for my next post.

Stay tuned...

I Need a Hobby

After spending a weekend with my friend Andrea who I consider the queen of blogging and my best friend for 20 plus years, I decided that I should give it a try.  And by "it" I mean blogging. 

I have a lot going on in my life right now.  My husband and I have been trying to start a family for three years, I'm not a huge fan of my job (who is?), my husband I want to put our house on this terrible market, although I think he only does because he's tired of hearing me talk about it, and I've been considering going back to school for law enforcement which has been a dream of mine for like ten years. 

So that's a lot right?  Well, I'm starting to think that all of these "things" I've been thinking about (besides the family part) are actually just me having too much time on my hands to think.  My husband has politely told me (to avoid always calling him "my husband" I should probably just call him Ben)...Ben has politely told me before that I should get a hobby because I spend A LOT of time watching A LOT of tv, most of which are trashy reality shows which I'm sure will make a lot of appearances in this blog.  The part about watching a lot of tv that Ben doesn't particularly enjoy is that it's not productive whatsoever (especially the shows I watch). I still watch a lot of tv now, but I've managed to fit in a lot of exercise and have lost over 50 pounds in the last six months, so my excessive tv watching doesn't seem as bad now that I'm productive and healthy.

I'm getting side-tracked, so maybe this blogging won't be as hard as I'm anticipating it to be.  Coming up with a blog title however, was more difficult than one would think.  I was thinking either "I Need a Hobby" or "My Husband Says..." but they didn't seem just right to me.  I asked Ben for his advice and he said how about "The Smartest Ruley" because that is what his family always calls me and I have no idea how it started, nor do I think I am the smartest Ruley.  All of the Ruley's are smart in their own way, but I think Ben's mom (aka, my mother-in-law) deserves this title...and not in the annoying mother-in-law way...she's actually really smart.

So now that I have the title of my new blog and I've given you a little background about me, I'm going to give this a genuine try.  I haven't exactly pin-pointed what I will be blogging about, but I'm thinking it will be a mix of everything.  Trying to conceive, my take on the many many tv shows that I watch (at least I will have a purpose with watching tv now....YES! why didn't I think of this before?!), exercising and eating healthy, and any other adventures that I so choose.

I do have one disclaimer though...I have NO idea what I'm doing when it comes to blogging.  I don't follow any blogs (including Andrea's - it is only read on occasions...aka...when she links to it on Facebook or tells me that I should read something she posted).  So bare with my while I get this figured out!